Agenda

What’s your agenda? Self-full or selfish? Self-full means to fulfill your purpose in a mindful way. Mindful of what? Mindful of others’ humanity. Selfish on the other hand is: it’s all about me. An example:

I was out to dinner with my mother and son. A waiter spilled his drink on my son. My mother said: “It’s a good thing that didn’t happen to me.” Now, we might all have thought that, too. However, appropriate empathy would be directed to the injured party, my son with the Coke all over him.

Do I put me first? Do I need to always be #1 in relationships? Am I longing rather than loving? Getting rather than giving as my main or sole priority.

Liking is about what I am getting. Longing is about what I’m not getting. Loving is about giving.

Loving and longing can look the same: Attention, Acceptance, Appreciation, Affection. But the Agenda is different. True gift, no strings attached. Or, manipulation.

Agenda is key in any relationship. Do I value the other more or the relationship more? Do I hold back in saying what needs to be said out of fear of damaging the relationship (what I am getting) or do I value the well-being of the other first?